Last Post from Kenya (though we've been back almost a month) :)

• (I wrote this blog post just before leaving Kenya but I'm just now posting it... I'm working on another post today that should be up soon.)

We now have two days left in Kenya. It is strange to think that after being here four different times in the past 3 years, we don’t know if or when we will be back again. This place has been full of many and extreme challenges for us at times. However, it has also been a place of healing, growth, rest, and learning to trust the Lord more.

The past four weeks have been full of a lot of ups and downs. However, I am thankful that we were in Kenya to receive the news about the match as it has given us a little time to process things while being away from the normal busyness and every day pressures of home. It has been a quiet and refreshing time for me overall. I have read five books since I’ve been here. Most of my days here have been filled with caring for Nathaniel, cooking, exercise (lots of long walks combined with pilates videos at home), going to the market, reading, writing, making new friends, hosting and being hosted, emailing, photography, teaching, and spending time with Jason (and wasting some time on facebook here and there I must admit). The days have passed at a relaxed pace, with little to ever hurry about. That is one thing that I absolutely love about Kenya that can also drive me crazy sometimes – no one is ever in a hurry. I feel like I spend most of my life hurrying around at home – usually due to poor planning or procrastination on my part. I hate rushing though. It always leaves me feeling stressed and frustrated. People who are relaxed, gracious, and seem to be fully immersed in the moment always amaze me.

One of the books I just finished reading was called “The Rest of God” by Mark Buchanan. I would describe it as fascinating, convicting, challenging, and inspiring. A missionary here loaned the book to me and it touched on so many things that I have been thinking and praying a lot about over the past year. The basic premise is the concept of Sabbath and how it should be practiced both weekly and in attitude. Some of the topics that God has already been working on me about included…

• Giving all of my time to the Lord (It is all His anyway – it is a gift to me)
•   Finding my worth in who I am in Christ and not in what I do
• Releasing people and things that I hold too tightly (trust in God’s sovereignty)
•  Living unhurried
•  Soaking in each moment and day and fully experiencing them as the Lord intends
•  Taking time to really stop and listen to the voice of God

These are just a few of the many topics discussed. It really made me stop and think about how often I miss the fullness of God’s intent for me. How often I buy into the cultural lies about what is really important. How often I seek the things that can never fulfill me.

Nothing can fulfill me except God. Relationship with Him and complete surrender to Him is the only place that satisfaction is found.

Do I really believe this? Do I live like this is true? So often I still run from one thing to another – looking for something to fill me up. When I struggle with discontentment I try to figure out where my life is lacking or what I should be doing differently. When I compare myself with others, I think through how I could be more of this or that or do things better. I’m always trying to figure out how I can be more and do more.

Jesus, teach me to rest. Let me live in Your truth.