Thoughts along the Way

It is in sorrow and suffering that we see. It is through pain and disappointment that we seek God. It is through changed plans that we run to our Creator. It is in the waiting that we most desire peace. It is in the midst of fear that our hearts desire to be free. It is in sadness that we long for joy. It is in grief and loss that we seek wholeness. It is in sickness that we ask for true healing. It is when our hearts are broken and hurting the most, that we seek the God of all comfort in ways we would never seek Him otherwise.

Why?

Because our hearts and lives are no longer whole, pure, and one with God - the way they were in the beginning. At creation of humanity, before sin entered the world, our hearts were bound together in perfect unity with our Creator. When sin entered, that bond of unity was broken. The only way for us to walk in perfect unity and relationship with God again is through the redemptive work of Christ. Because of our Savior, the veil caused by sin has been torn, and we can now once again enter the presence of our Lord. We can walk with Him, day by day, moment by moment, just as Adam and Eve did in Eden.

But we don’t.

We don’t walk with Him in perfect fellowship - even as saved, redeemed, children of God. We fight, struggle, fear, and pull away from the One who gave us life.

Why?

Because we still live in the midst of this sinful, fallen world, and we continue to battle both our flesh and the enemy of our souls. We are distracted, prideful, busy, envious, discontent, impatient, lustful, selfish, out of balance, exhausted, lazy, enticed… All of these things and more pull us away from being in the presence of our Savior. They keep us from walking with Him, truly listening and enjoying Him, and knowing more of who He is. While it is true that He lives in those who trust in Him alone for salvation, and therefore is always “present” with them, we still must choose to “abide” in His presence.

What does it mean to abide?

I still cannot fully grasp the concept of “abiding”, “remaining in”, or “walking with” Christ. Although I am praying for continued knowledge and depth of understanding of this concept, it seems to hold the idea in scripture of “engaging with”, “being in tune with”, and “drawing life from”. For example: There are many times we are in a conversation but not engaged – our mind is wandering, we aren’t listening or caring, etc. There are also times we are sharing an experience with someone but are not fully there, for the same reasons as above. The concept of the vine and branches in John 15 also implies that as the branch, we draw our life and strength from the Vine (Christ) as we abide in Him. I think this means that throughout the day we choose to be engaged in the things of Christ – His thoughts and words. We focus on how He is working in and around us, and we ask for Him to work through us. We draw our strength and refreshment from His Word and life. We rest in His presence instead of living in fear, anxiety, or defeat.

So what?

God wants a close, abiding, relationship with us. He wants to be glorified in and through us. He wants His love to consume every part of who we are. With all of the distractions and things working against us in this world, we often don’t seek Him and know Him.

Until…

Tragedy strikes; our plans change; we lose something or someone we love; fear seems to be taking over; we are in a waiting that never seems to end; we can’t make sense of what is happening; nothing can ease our pain, sickness, or loss…

It is here that we seek God.

It is here that we are broken before Him.

It is here that He gives the peace and comfort that can only come from Him.

It is here that we surrender.

We must surrender…

…to anything and everything that God wants to do in and through our lives in the midst of this crazy, painful, disappointing, and fallen world. When we scream, cry, and want to run away, we must run to Him.

But why does He allow these things?

I don’t know. But I do know that He originally made a world that was pain, sickness, death, and sin free. He made a world where we walked with Him in a beautiful garden in the cool of the day. It was a place with incredible animals grazing peacefully together, and with perfect unity between man and woman. We are the ones who messed it up (with help from Satan). We are now living in the midst of things done our way.

What now?

I have to run to God instead of from Him. I have to let Him use all of the heart-breaking, frustrating, and overwhelming times in my life to draw me to Himself. I want to experience His presence in a whole new way. I want to walk with Him – engaged with His thoughts, words, and actions. I want to draw my very life, my every breath, from His life. I want to be comforted by His arms; reassured of truth by His voice; transformed into His image by His hand.

How?

How do I do this? How do I stop fearing and fighting all of the hard stuff that has already happened, and all that is yet to come on this earth? I wish I knew a complete and easy answer, but here are a few things I am learning…

·      I must continually read and study Scripture and speak truth to my heart.

·      I must be willing to be open and vulnerable with others. Community is so important.

·      I must be willing to ask for prayer and be continually in prayer myself.

·      I must focus on others.

·      I need God’s perspective – eternal perspective – on each situation.

·      I must rest when needed and work when needed. I need wisdom to know the difference. (God will give wisdom when asked! – Prov.2 & James 1)

·      I must find ways to process and be refreshed when struggling – playing piano, writing, music, talking, exercise, etc.

·      I must remember that God’s kingdom is here now, but that it is also yet to come in all its fullness.

I keep reminding myself that every thing and every person in the universe is all part of God’s story. His plan is to win His children back, to right all the wrong, and to conquer and defeat all sin, sickness, suffering, and death. Until He comes again and completes His work, I will allow these things – with His power and strength – to draw me closer to Him, teach me to abide, and to let His glory be seen.